Blame it on Colorado
but I’ve kind of become a hippy. Perhaps I always was one and living in this
beautiful state has allowed me to truly express myself. I am not a vegetarian,
I don’t make my own clothes, I shave and I drink alcohol so I guess this exempts
me from being classified as a total
“hippy” but I have realized when it comes to motherhood there are a few things
that set me apart. This started with my desire to have a natural childbirth but
has since extended into other areas of raising Charlotte
as well. It’s not that I think there is anything wrong with the way anyone else
chooses to parent I just want to share my experiences with what has worked for
us and information that may help other mothers out there when it comes to the
basics: sleeping, diapering, vaccines.
Co-Sleeping: I
started down this path from the day Charlotte
was born. My hospital advocates that infants stay in the room with you and I
could not have agreed more. When your child sleeps in the same room it helps
them to regulate their breathing and you also learn their cues and cries. Charlotte
would not go down in the bassinet the hospital provided so she slept in the bed
with either Chad
or me. When we came home we would put her to sleep in the snugabunny vibrating
chair at night but whenever she woke up I would feed her and in the bed she
stayed. You are waking every 1.5 hours or so to feed them so there is just no
point in having them in another room. However, after 4 weeks of no sleep
something had to give. One night she was crying after having been fed and
changed and Chad
put her in the bassinet, dragged her into her room and shut the door. My heart
broke for her hearing her cry. Ten minutes later she was asleep and so was I.
From that day on I started researching more about sleep schedules and was
determined to stick to one. What is currently working for us now is feeding Charlotte
every two hours, letting her play then letting her sleep. I make sure she gets
three naps a day and sometimes those naps last ten minutes and sometimes 2
hours. I started to implement the schedule around 6 weeks but by that point I
had learned Charlotte’s cries and
could differentiate between hungry, tired or bored. When she was a newborn
anytime she cried I would stick a boob in her mouth. I soon learned, however, I
was doing her a disservice because she was “snacking” all day and not getting
full meals. I read “The Nursing Mother’s Companion” and once I became better at
breast feeding it made all the difference with Charlotte’s
sleeping. I cannot thank my doula Casey enough for recommending that book to me
and I highly recommend every mother picking up a copy.
Now that we are not co-sleeping both Charlotte and I sleep a
lot better. At nine weeks she is sleeping from 8:30pm
until about 4:30 or 5:30am. I get some time to myself at night with
Chad and after
her early morning wake up she usually goes back to sleep from the time she
wakes until mid morning. Here is where you must listen to your instincts. For
the first few weeks mine told me to feed her on demand and allow her to sleep
in the bed. After wanting to jump off a bridge from being sleep deprived my
instincts told me different. I know proponents of co-sleeping and putting them
in their own room and I’ve tried both and I must say both served their purpose
for the length of time we tried them.
Diapering: I knew
I wanted to cloth diaper from the beginning but I didn’t know how to go about
doing so. My reason for choosing to cloth diaper is not only environmental but
economical. Diapers are expensive and I couldn’t fathom spending so much money
weekly on something that will be filled with poop and thrown away. I would get
more satisfaction from lighting my money on fire. Fortunately my friend Nikki
helped us kick start our cloth diapering collection by gifting me a set that
she had received as a hand me down. My mom had also bought me some on Ebay so I
had a set of FuzziBunz and about ten snaps. My friend Jessica also bought me a
Rumparooz for a gift and honestly if I were to buy a complete set these are the
ones I would choose.
I like how they have an extra liner on the thigh to
prevent leakage and are a one size fits all from newborn on up. The Fuzzibunz
came with Velcro in extra small and since the set was used the Velcro is a
little worn out. I must take extra care to make sure it’s secure or we end up
with a diaper falling off. The small, medium and large all have snaps which
have been a lot easier to secure. I must admit I was intimidated by using cloth
diapers at first. I used disposables for the first five weeks because Charlotte
was so tiny and the newborn diapers fit her best. Plus I liked the pampers
because they had an indicator line on the diaper that turned blue when the
diaper was wet – very cool! I still use disposables when we will be out and
about all day or when we travel but for the most part I use cloth. You do not
have to use diaper cream with the cloth because they don’t get diaper rash and
as a bonus since they are so big and bulky she can wear some of her bigger
onsies because they take up room! I do laundry every 2-3 days and because it is
just breast milk I do not have to rinse the diapers before throwing in the
washer. I know some of you are thinking, “That’s so gross you throw poop in the
washer!” Well let me tell you, babies have frequent blow outs and poop will end
up on most of their clothing and sometimes yours. I use the sanitize setting on
my washer to clean them and there is never any poop stains on the diapers
after. Here is where I consider myself a bit of a hippy….or perhaps it’s just
going back to a tried and true method. I want to limit the amount of plastic Charlotte
is exposed too. If you think about it most everything around children is
plastic – toys, bottles, diapers, mattress, high chairs, playgrounds, teething
toys. If I can limit her exposure to plastics which have been proven toxic then
I will….and it doesn’t hurt to save money while I’m at it.
Vaccinations: In
yoga one of my motto's when it comes to poses is, “Does the risk outweigh the
benefit?” For my own body and my students, some poses are just not worth the
risk of injury they can cause. The same, I feel is true for vaccines. The side
effects of some are not worth the supposed benefit they claim to cause. While I
want Charlotte to be safe I also do
not want her to be a pin cushion. If I wouldn’t get six shots a day for myself
then why would I do that for her? Here’s where my hippy side kicked in and I
began researching a delayed vaccine schedule. I chose Peak Pediatrics because
they were recommend by my friend Kylie and also supported delaying vaccines
which was important to me. If your child’s pediatrician does not support your
choices then I suggest you find another so you won’t be butting heads your child's whole life. At birth your child is supposed to receive a Hep B and
Vitamin K shot and eye goop. These are recommended by the state and so unless
you decline treatment that is what the hospital will administer. I saw no
reason for the Hep B or the eye goop (to prevent STD’s which I do not have) so
I only had Charlotte get the Vitamin K shot which helps their blood clot
because that was the only one that made sense to me.
At two months the CDC recommends: Hep B (second dose from
when they were born), Rotavirus, DTaP, Hib, PCV and Polio. I decided to follow
an alternative vaccine schedule because I felt like there has been overwhelming
research done that suggests a severe reaction can be likely upon giving 5-6
vaccines at one time. The alternative schedule won’t overwhelm young immune
systems but still provides protection.
So at our 2 month appointment the other day Charlotte
received Hib and DTaP. The DTaP is for diphtheria, tetanus and pertussis and
the Hib is for Haemophilus influenza Type B bacteria that were once the leading
cause of childhood blood infections, pneumonia and meningitis. Both vaccines
had relatively low side effects and Charlotte
seemed a little lethargic the next day but did not develop a fever and wasn’t
fussy.
Delaying vaccines means more trips to the pediatrician but
that is ok with me because they weigh and measure her as well. If you are
interested in knowing what the different vaccines are and the delayed schedule
you can read more about it here. I will not be giving Charlotte
the Hep B and Hep A vaccine because the only way they are transmitted is
through bodily fluids – especially sex, fecal matter and sharing needles. I
don’t think Charlotte will be doing
any of those things anytime soon.
Before I had Charlotte
I did so much research into labor and delivery. I became so consumed with her
birth that I did not do much thinking about what would happen after she was
here. Having an infant makes time spent researching a little more difficult but
it is so important. The decisions you make for your baby are important ones
because they cannot advocate for themselves. I guess this is where the whole
parenting thing comes in to play. I am not saying any way is right or wrong,
just that as parents you have to do your research and trust your instincts and
see what works best for you. Baptism by fire at its best!
Speaking of instincts we are testing out a nanny for the
next few Mondays while I return to teaching yoga and before I have to go back
to my life in the sky as a flight attendant. Yesterday was the first time I had
left her alone with a stranger and it killed me! We found our nanny on Care.com
after interviewing a few people and getting stood up by a few no shows. I
recommend the site as a helpful tool in connecting with care takers in your
area but again ultimately you must do your homework. After calling this girls
reference I felt comfortable enough to leave Charlotte
with her for a few hours. When I came home Charlotte
was crying but she wasn’t any worse for the wear. How do you know if you trust
the right person with your child? I read that the right nanny should be an
extension of you. No one could possibly love Charlotte
as much as I do but I’m willing to take a chance and trust that maybe this girl
can come close. Like most things I’m finding out, when it comes to parenting
the answers aren’t always in books or online…they are in your heart. I trust my
heart to lead me in the right direction when it comes to returning to work and
entrusting the care of Charlotte
with someone new. While this is not easy for me I can only take it day by day.
I try and resist the urge to not cry when I leave her. Am I
doing the right thing with all of this? I have no idea. I don’t think anyone
does. What a relief.
I agree 100% with the delayed vaccine schedule, I need to get my husband on board though...
ReplyDeleteI am ordering that breastfeeding book you suggested, thank you for the tip
Oh good! I wish I had read that book before I had Charlotte but I reference it often as it becomes more relevant. Baby wise is a great book as well.
ReplyDeleteTell your husband if he is worried that your child will still get the vaccines he/she needs just over time! Reading about the side effects def made me realize too many at once aren't worth it!