Gratitude is an attitude and the week of Thanksgiving always
serves as a reminder for us to be thankful. Watching an episode of “Extreme
Couponers Black Friday Edition,” last night reminded me however, that most of
us are still never satisfied with all that we have. On this reality show I
watched as women who were, most likely counting their blessings the day before,
stood in line shoulder to shoulder at big box retailers counting their money to
shell out on things. Some were shopping for needy families which is a wonderful
idea but others simply couldn’t pass up buying $100 worth of leggings and crock
pots so they could get a free coin purse (true story). So what exactly are we
thankful for? How does gratitude shape our attitude? I’ve had an exceptional
year as I know many of my friends have filled with loss and gain, tears and
adventures and I have to say when it comes down to it everything that happened
to me this year happened for me.
I’m grateful for pain as a teacher. Without tears I wouldn’t
know what it means to smile. I’m grateful for the loss of friends. People I
would have never evicted from my life if the universe hadn’t shifted for me. I’m
grateful for losing my house in the decision to sell it so I could know what
having a home truly means. I’m thankful I can look back on my old house with
fondness and even drive by there now and again when I feel nostalgic. I’m
grateful for coming close to losing my job so that I can assess if flying is
truly what I want to do or it’s just a bookmark before the next chapter. I’m
thankful for when my daughter is sick so I can appreciate having a healthy
child 99% of the time. I’m grateful for the cracks that show up in my marriage
and getting a tiny peek into what life would be life without my husband. I’m
thankful for the fights I have with my family because at least I have a family
I can communicate with even if we don’t always agree. The scratches in my
furniture and hair on the floor remind me how thankful I am for my pets even if
I KNOW they love me more than I could ever love them.
I’m grateful for my friends who have become mothers
themselves this year for the first or second time. I am happy to see their love
grow as much as I am the dark circles under their sleepless eyes. I’m grateful
they have the opportunity to have stretch marks and baby weight and months of
abstaining from alcohol to breast feed because being a mother is a job the
universe doesn’t grant everyone. I’m grateful for my friends who have gone
through sickness this year so they can know what it’s like to be surrounded by
love and support. I’m thankful for them to find their strength in a dark time
in their lives and a voice for the illnesses they battle. When you know someone
who has a parent, child or is fighting themselves it puts life in perspective
on what truly matters in this world. I’m grateful for my friends who don’t keep
in touch because it reminds me communication works both ways and I need to put
in more effort.
I could say I’m grateful for my own health and all the
things I have but in truth it’s the times I’ve gone without that have truly
made me thankful. A sore throat gives me gratitude for the days I’m well and a
bank account that’s lacking reminds me to enjoy the times I can buy a coffee
without checking my balance first. Gratitude to me isn’t an attitude of
relishing in my abundance it’s about the attitude I have when the universe
smacks me down. How I get up from a fall teaches me more of a lesson than being
untouchable on top. We can all be grateful for what we have…it’s harder to be
thankful for what we do not.
So thank you pain for being a teacher. For the tears and the
sorrow this year. Thank you work for making me fly on weekends so I know what
it is to enjoy my family time. Thank you Charlotte for being difficult some
days so I can look at you when you’re finally asleep with appreciation. Thank
you opportunities that were never handed to me so I could make my own. My
attitude has greatly shifted this year from one of entitlement to one of
working hard to have what I need in love, jobs, yoga, friendships and family. It’s
good to have nothing, to start over. To borrow from Brue Lee, ““Emptiness is
the starting point. — In order to taste my cup of water you must first empty
your cup. My friend, drop all your preconceived and fixed ideas and be neutral.
Do you know why this cup is useful? Because it is empty.”
Drop everything. Let life fill you up. Be grateful for an
empty cup and see what life puts in there for you…and when it gets full? Dump
it out and start over.
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